Going to India....

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I and mom are leaving for India, on 10th. We could not get the date any earlier coz of the Eid holidays.
Ceremonies required after the death of my grandma are already done. There will be one more ceremony which will be conducted on 11th day after the death.
Every one born/ first related to the person died has to attend this ceremony. My dad could not come, though he will be in holidays as he has get a paper permitting him to travel has t be signed by GD - and GD in somewhere in Germany!
The return dates are not yet decided and we are thinking of buying tickets from India. I think we will return somewhere in Jan.
I hope all goes well in India, cox the atmosphere is very depressive and my mom is both physically and emotionally very fragile.

The worst part is I CAN'T CRY!!
In India, if someone dies, everyone has to cry, I feel sad at heart but simply my eyes don't show it! It s is so bad if you are a social gathering and everyone is crying - I can't, they will stare at me like hell!
It is not something funny - they think I am inert to such things. Actually I am not - I feel sad my grandma died - but I can't shed a tear...
Am I the only one with such weird thing?


2 comments:

Daniel said...

Have a safe trip.

jana z. said...

no...there are alot of people who dont cry even when they are totally sad. men are more like this than women.

dont worry. i know the others will look at you and wonder but you cant make yourself cry.